Have you ever experienced a time when a friend didn’t return your call or respond to your text? Let’s say that the friend you are trying to reach tends to go silent when she is upset with someone. Knowing this, you assume that she is ghosting you and is deliberately ignoring your attempts to
reach her. Instantly, you start feeling mistreated, discounted, and annoyed at your friend. You complain to others about her and the more you talk about it, the more upset you get.
Later, you find out that your friend’s phone was stolen and it has taken her a few days to get a replacement. How would you feel after you learned the real story? The truth is you really didn't know why your friend didn't returned your call, but you made up a story that upset you and
then, you believed it. In reality, it was nothing more than a story you made up.
When an artist paints a picture of a vase of flowers, her artwork might look very much like the original vase of flowers. Other times, the art is very different from the actual vase of flowers because it is the artist's interpretation of the subject.
Our thoughts are comparable to a paintbrush. We see or experience something and our mind wants to
make sense out of it. We make up a story (paint a picture) of what the experience means and we react to the story. It feels real to us and we forget that we made it up.
Errors in judgement happen to everyone, including me. No one is immune to the illusions that thought creates. Even when you understand the nature of thought, you will still get tricked into reacting to a "thought mirage" from time to time.
The good news is that
with practice, you will be able to see thought for what it is (not real) and regain your balance more quickly. Learning to question your thoughts and not take them so seriously can help you have better experiences of life and better relationships with others.
With loving support,
Linda
